Today i met the cutest little boy... he was almost three and i was informed his mom wasn't around often and he cried alot because he missed her.
his abandonment and sadness showed through his eyes... and his need for love from his mother was absolutely heartbreaking. I asked him to sit and have lunch by me and we shared my french fries and talked about elmo. I told him i was going to go and said bye and he said I want to go with you. I cried immediately at a table full of people. He was me.... when i was 3. So i went outside and played with him and his auntie and we had a good time. I told him i would see him later that night and he said ok.
5 hours later... i saw him and right away he came and sat on my lap. My daughter naya.. looked at me like what is he doing? and i told her that he was my friend. So she went back to coloring her buggies. He grabbed my hand and pulled me to the table to get food and i went with him... we sat and ate together... and i just kept looking at him and wanted to explain to him how life was cruel and that even though his parents didn't show him love that he was loveable and worth sooo much....
He had to drive back to his home with his aunt and he came to say goodbye to me... he said goodbye ad i said i will see you soon.. and he said "can you come with me?" and i said i cannot.. i live here in chicago. He started crying , his face filled with such pain.. i said it would be ok... knowing it would not be ok for him. that life has dealt him a bad hand and to make a good hand out of it would be so hard and maybe for some impossible.
I didn't know what to say.. i just rubbed his shoulder and said i will see you soon. ok? then he had to go and let sobbing.
I am him. He is me.
The connection.
I saw myself. He saw himself and we didn't want to let each other go.
I will never forget his eyes... and i will never forget him.
this is one of the biggest reasons that i love you and feel so much hope for you… you have an empathy that is unmatched - a way of doing more than putting yourself in another person’s shoes… you actually see yourself reflected in them. and you feel it to the deepest part of you. as you heal, i think that this ability will be a part of so many other’s healing. you healed something in that little boy… and even if it was a small piece, you were an angel for him. you say you won’t forget his eyes - i don’t think he’ll forget yours either. you embodied the hope that he won’t always be left alone… and that is probably the most significant thing he needs to feel in his little life…
ReplyDeleterest in the hope that he does have an auntie- uncle -cousin and grandma that love him dearly and will always fight for him- he might not have the winnig cards but he has a good enough hand in which to play- he is loved and always will be... you have a big heart and bless alot of people with it... he is acyually a happy little boy full of love and passion... he will be more than okay in life... i promise.. it was nice to see you.. hopefully sooner next time... come with naya and let them all be friends and play while we drink coffee and imagine there futures... we love you and naya...
ReplyDeletei saw this on your fb... so sad, but i love your writing -ally
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